Notes from the Bludhouse
You know, as much as we make fun of comics companies changing the race or sexuality of characters as an attention-grabbing shock tactic, I would totally buy an Blacksploitation Black Knight comic. Maybe pair him up with Misty Knight and Colleen Wing. The more I think about it, the more I like it. Make it happen, Marvel. Get Khari Evans to draw it.
Uploaded by Jude Terror at 18:57 on 28 April
Mon 18 March
by Jude Terror
The internet was abuzz Monday morning when dozens of loyal readers woke up, poured their morning coffee, and sat down in front of their computer screens to view the latest episode of the wildly popular webcomic, Just a Little More Blud, only to find that the second part in the eagerly anticipated Comic Con trilogy had not been posted. Instead, only a self-aggrandizing, fourth-wall breaking news release making the comic seem more important than it actually is was published on the site, jalmb.theouthousers.com.
"I was shocked when the comic wasn't posted," said Kunio Kawasaki, a reader in North Korea, where the strip is the second most popular webcomic in the entire country. "The laughter and joy that reading Just a Little More Blud brings me is the only thing that keeps me alive since my beloved leader Kim Jong Un gave my wife and two young daughters as a gift to U.S. ambassador Dennis Rodman. Now, I have nothing left to live for."
"Please post the strip soon," he added tearfully.
We spoke to multi-talented Outhouse reporter Jude Terror, who is one of the three creators that produces the strip every week. "It's an unfortunate situation," he told himself, since he is also writing this article. "I mean, with [fellow JALMB creator] Jon Salwen being off in the Phillipines working as an actual doctor, and with [other fellow JALMB creator] SuperginraiX having taken on a lot of extra responsibility in the Mormon Church, producing the strip has become a very complicated venture, where any number of complex and unimaginable problems could prevent the strip from getting out on time."
"In this case, we lost the script," he explained. "We have this fully drawn and colored comic, but we no longer remember what it's about. Jon knows, but we can't get in touch with him."
So it's nobody's fault.
"It's Jon's fault," Terror countered.
Because he can't be reached to obtain a copy of the script?
"Because he's not here to defend himself," Terror replied.
"Look," said SuperginraiX, speaking from his penthouse office atop the headquarters of the Church of Latter Day Saints in Salt Lake City, Utah. "It's a rough time right now. We couldn't even get our hands on a fake name generator with a Korean option when writing this article. We had to use the Japanese setting for the guy up in the second paragraph, fully aware that it's racist. We had no other options. Would you have liked us to apply that same lack of judgement to the strip itself? It's better that it's delayed."
Better? Perhaps. But for who?
"For everyone," SuperginraiX told us. "For everyone."
At press time, Terror and GinraiX were hard at work attempting to release the comic within a day or two, and were absolutely not getting shitface wasted to celebrate Saint Patrick's Day.